Turn Offs

Thought for the Day – Stop liking your own posts on FB. The fact that you put it up conveys that you like it.

This was a post I saw on Facebook today & reminded me of a guy who is guilty of this. The first time I was going through his timeline & saw that he liked his own posts, I remember thinking “This is a loser’s habit”. I completely lost interest in him that day.

Which brings me to what I consider turn-offs in guys. Why do I blog about these things? Because I know my preferences and I hope that a guy who’s interested in me will know these and do things accordingly. After all, can I expect something from someone without letting them know? 🙂

The list, in no particular order:

  • Using the phone while conversing with me. I know it’s difficult to do in this digital era but I’m making an effort and I expect you to do the same. I would prefer if it came naturally but if not, make an effort. The only exception to this is if somebody’s ill at home. Work is the worst excuse.
  • Lame social media behaviour such as liking your own post, sharing photos of motivational/good morning quotes, checking in at every place, etc. I’m sorry but this is like grammar nazism for me.
  • Using txtng lingo, like LOL. I would much rather prefer ‘haha’ or an emoji. LOL is so emotionless. Texting language, beyond anything, is difficult to read.
  • Not using emojis. Emojis add so much colour to the conversation and keeps it light. Not using emojis leaves me confused about whether you’re enjoying talking to me.
  • Calling me ‘babe’ or ‘baby’. OMFG. What a turn off.
  • More than 30% of texts are sexts. Too many sexts makes a guy seem interested more in his own pleasure than in me.
  • Idea of a first date is dinner/lunch/coffee at a restaurant/bistro or worse, watching a movie. This point needs a post of its own but another time. I like being pampered, experiencing new things, ultra romantic dinners- basically, something which shows that the guy has put some thought & effort in this date. Just the other day a guy asked me what my idea of an ideal date is and I told him this, verbatim:
    • I think dinner/lunch/brunch is boring, for a date I mean.
    • Movies are worse. Can’t talk to the other person so no point.
    • Crowded places also are not great. Unless it’s an amusement park and we’re riding roller coasters.
    • I like new experiences
  • Absolutely no effort in dressing. Sorry but true. I’m not talking about designer wear or quirky fashion off the runway. Just well groomed. If I can wax and thread before a f-ing date, the boy better at least pick out the right clothes.
  • Beefed up guys. Another huge turn off. I like fit, but beefed up is crazy. Just look like you play a sport regularly enough to stay healthy and that’ll do. But getting beefed up by spending hours at the gym is sad. (Actually I judge any 20-something year old who goes to the gym anyway.)
  • Dieting. I can’t stand hearing “I’m not going to eat this because I’m on a diet”.
  • Being high all the time. You’re in your late 20s so what is this regularly getting high business?
  • And the winner of this list is – Lying. I believe that lying stems from cowardice and there’s nothing as turning off as cowardice and lies. I’ve had painful experiences because of this and can’t stand it any more. I’m comfortable with being uncomfortable so I don’t find the need to lie and I expect the same from the boy. If the boy can’t be straightforward, what is the future?

So these are the major points on my list. I have some expectations from dating and I believe being aware of expectations makes it worthwhile for both. Ideally I’d expect the guy to learn all this from my friends but my friends are all over the world and I don’t introduce them to every guy I date.

To better dating!

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